Life after Yawgmoth

Posted on Friday, August 20th, 2010 by Mobiusman
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Posted in M11 contest entry, mtg

The events of the year 4205, commonly – if dramatically – referred to as ‘The Apocalypse’, left a lot of unresolved problems for Dominaria as a whole to deal with. Now, ten years later, the Good Gamery news team has set out to find the answer to one question nobody seems to want to ask: What happened to all the artifacts?

“Just look at this thing,” sighs Saldrath, the celebrated artificer and optician known for his work restoring the Glasses of Urza. He sits back hopelessly in his chair and hands us a Phyrexian Lens. Sure enough, only a murky darkness is visible through the innocuous glass eyepiece. “It can’t have always been like this,” Sadrath grumbles. “Otherwise they wouldn’t have been able to see, right?”

The optometrical tragedy is not an isolated incident. Historical relics and household conveniences alike bearing the mark of the Father of Machines have ceased to function ever since his destruction ten years ago. Junior research assistants walking through Phyrexian Portals have gone missing. Phyrexian Processors produce 0/0 specimens, which are put in their owner’s graveyards as a state-based action. Phyrexian Vaults refuse to lock their doors.

Although these malfunctions may seem trivial compared to the large-scale ecological changes that have occured across Dominaria in the past decade, some experts are concerned about their lasting impact. Kabel, Tolarian archivist, tells us: “the fact is, we don’t know if society can function without Phyrexian power. Obviously we can do without the Phyrexian War Beasts and such, but what about Phyrexian Dishwashers? Phyrexian AC Converters? Phyrexian Change Sorters? No-one likes to admit it, but our economy is heavily reliant on Phyrexian manufacturing.”

Certainly big talk, but for one Kjeldoran patrolman, the effects of the crisis have a more immediate form. Thangbrand Gyrdsson stands kneedeep in snow outside his newly-built home, futilely adjusting dials on his Phyrexian Snowcrusher. “Every winter, we go through this,” Thangbrand seethes, sticking his head into one of the many dormant chimneys on the juggernaut’s surface. “Give me the Invasion any day!”