Author: ein

  • Zen and the Art of Shadowmoor Limited



    By now, many of you have realised that you are bad at shadowmoor limited. Your 3-2 prerelease record and first round draft losses have left you feeling empty, while the Swans of Bryn Argoll you sold for a dollar has left your wallet feeling the same way.

    But don’t lose hope! I too attended a shadowmoor prerelease, and my 4-1 record and second round draft loss have left me fully equipped to teach you the intricacies of shadowmoor draft and sealed. But not shadowmoor two headed giant. I could not find anyone willing to enter a 2hg with me, so that means you will have to go without my precious advice. Maybe next time you will be my friends. Assholes. :mad:

    Anyways, First I will review some of the ridiculous cards you may have missed.* I’ll also give a brief overview of why they’re ridiculous.

    White: White is the third strongest color in shadowmoor limited. In addition to solid creatures, it also has decent removal and combat tricks.

    Runed Halo: This is an enchantment that resides on your head like a hat. That by itself is pretty ridiculous, but it gets better from there. You can name Werebear with this card and 3-for-1 some crafty opponents by shutting down both Armadillo Cloak and Flame Fusillade.

    Reaper King: Reaper King is extremely strong in a white deck, giving them an 6/6 creature, far larger than white usually has access to.

    Blue: Blue is the third strongest color in shadowmoor limited. In addition to solid creatures, it also has decent removal and combat tricks.

    Savor the Moment: Savor the Moment is a subtly powerful card. At first glance, the card is just a variant on Kodama’s Reach, but there’s more to it. Crafty players will announce the card just loudly enough for the opponent to return their attention to the game, and then pass the turn. Then, when the opponent begins his turn, the crafty player can call over a judge to scold their opponent, effectively time walking them.

    Reaper King: Reaper King is extremely strong in a blue deck, giving them access to land destruction, something they do not usually have access to.

    Black: Black is the third strongest color in Morningtide. In addition to solid creatures, it also has decent removal and combat tricks.

    Plague of Vermin: Plague of Vermin may be the strongest card costing 6B you will ever cast. It allows you to relentlessly exchange your life for rats, which will relentlessly punish your opponent for not having a deck full of rats as relentless as yours. Unless their deck is full of Relentless Rats, in which case, Mirrorweave. Relentless Ownage.

    Reaper King: Reaper King is extremely powerful in a Black deck, giving you access to artifact removal, an area where black has traditionally struggled.

    Red: Red is the third strongest color in shadowmoor. In addition to solid creatures, it also has decent removal and combat tricks. And Burn Trail.

    Furystoke Giant: When I opened my first draft pack, I was shocked and awed to see Arc-Slogger and Flame Fusillade packed in their, furiously having red-hot sex**. In exchange for giving them the film from my camera, they let me have their ridiculous lovechild. His name, you may ask? Dr. G.G. Noob. Make sure you politely introduce him to all your friends.

    Reaper King: Reaper King is extremely powerful in a Red deck, giving you access to enchantment removal, in the rare event there are enchantments in play that have nothing to do with creatures.

    Green: Green is the third strongest color in shadowmoor. In addition to solid creatures, it also has decent removal and combat tricks. And can easily splash for Burn Trail.

    Prismatic Omen: In addition to being an excellent mana fixer in limited, this card has intriguing constructed applications. In conjunction with Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth Prismatic omen can make your swamps into plainsislandswampswampswampmountainforests. You’re gonna need some street savvy creatures to pull that off and live to tell about it, but if you can make it work, well…

    swampswampswamp. What else do I need to say?

    Reaper King: Reaper King is extremely powerful in a green deck, giving you access to a red, white, blue, and black artifact creature, something that green hasn’t had since ravnica block.

    In addition to this heads up on ridiculous cards, here are some strategy tips for draft:

    Avoid drafting the strongest or weakest colors. If you draft the strongest color, you are more likely to be cut off. If you draft the weakest color, you are more likely to be stupid. Try drafting the third strongest color, and hope for a reaper king.

    It is okay to shuffle packs, but do not shuffle packs together. Most judges won’t know the print runs for the new set yet, and they’ll be very cross with you if they have to fix your mess.

    If a pack has a rare and a foil rare, the foil rare may not be as valuable! Be careful not to make the mistake of first picking a foil Puca’s Mischief if the rare is a Sunken Ruins!







    *I’m sure you will think of cards that in your opinion should go here. But they shouldn’t. This is only for cards you missed. Obviously you didn’t miss them if you noticed their absence.

    ** The sex they were having was safe. Unlike your face, and your mom, and probably your moms face.

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  • GoodGamery News – Zen and the Art of Shadowmoor Limited

    Abysmal Hunter


    Local Wumpus hunter and bear-arm collector Rune McKnight was killed yesterday in a hunting accident when he went out after threshold. His mother, who was hunting with him at the time, was unharmed and was available to make a statement early this morning. “He told me to save myself, so I did,” said Mother of Runes, visibly tapped from the incident. She added “for weeks he had been talking about that Werebear he saw, and he just had to have it, but I guess he just ran into the wrong two bear arms.”

    Rakdos Goes Hybrid


    Rakdos, Inc. unveiled its new line of hybrid creatures at prerelease events across the country last Saturday. The creatures, which are both black and red, are said to be more manabase friendly than traditional models. Most players see this as a step in the right direction from a company that has a long-standing reputation of being harmful to manabases. “I just can’t afford BBB for products like Necropotence on my manabase,” says notable black player Osyp Lebioyzxiwkaspy, “and to make matters worse, Rakdos has come out with many products that actively destroy manabases, such as Stone Rain and Rain of Tears.”

    Consumer advocacy groups warn that while hybrid costs are easier to pay than traditional colored mana costs, some of the models are not as manabase friendly as advertised because the company has in some instances replaced colorless mana costs with the new hybrid mana costs.

    Nobel prize winning human economist Nobel Templar sees the move to hybrid costs as one of desperation from a company with an erratic stock price, and warns that the play may backfire. “Stockholders need to know at all times how their company is doing financially,” he says, “but investors who first-pick a Demigod of Revenge, for example, may not know until the fourth or fifth pick if their company is in the red or the black.”

    President Requests New War On Terror Budget

    The President sent a bill to Congress yesterday evening requesting another 301 million black mana to spend on the War on Terror. The proposal includes a plan to target every American with Aphotic Wisps. The White House spokesman was quoted as saying it will “effectively end Terror in the homeland.” Everyone in the world with an IQ of at least forty has noted that the same effect could be achieved for a single black mana with Darkest Hour, a fact that has gone unnoticed by the majority of Americans. Some conspiracy theorists believe a superior effect could be had for 1BR using Dralnu’s Crusade.

    Transguild Courier Voted Sexiest Artifact Creature — Golem Alive


    Transguild Courier was voted Sexiest Artifact Creature — Golem alive by readers of Golems magazine as published in the April issue. When summoned for comments, the artifact creature said “I appealed to environmentally-aware voters because of my reputation for being green, to patriotic voters because I am unashamed to prominently display my country’s colors, and to non-terrorist voters for my efforts to support the war on terror on both fronts.” When this reporter told him to “get over himself,” the golem responded “I am possibly the most humble golem alive, and one of the things that makes me so attractive is that my abilities are unaffected by my Humility.”

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