Let’s Talk About Wizard Fashion 
Wizards to Introduce New Psychographic Profile
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(Good Gamery has miraculously acquired a leaked, yet-to-be-published MagicTheGathering.com announcement! Take a look!)
Let’s bring out the psychographic profiles for a bit. Quick! What’s the first card that comes to mind for the following?
- Spike: Turn one, Goblin Lackey, go.
- Johnny: Squee, Goblin Nabob is my puzzle piece of choice.
- Timmy: KROSAN BEAST!!
- ???: Aisling Leprechaun has a certain charm you don’t see anymore.
Good job! Let’s try something different…
- Spike: Lotus Cobra. For winning.
- Johnny: Master Transmuter shenanigans.
- Timmy: SHIVAN METEOR!!!
- ???: His early work had something to it. Tainted Specter, you know?
Maybe one more for good measure.
- Spike: …I don’t play EDH.
- Johnny: Does it go infinite? No?
- Timmy: AIN’T NO EMRAKULLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- ???: Pyramids, obviously. At least someone still knows the classics.
Now, who’s our mystery man?
Introducing another choice for the non-psychonormative out there:
Bartholomew may or may not have been around forever, but he makes sure to act like he has been! He is the Magic equivalent of your senile grandfather with the stories about how things used to be, except instead of talking about the World War II, Bartholomew likes to discuss Legends print runs. We always try to make Magic a game for everyone, and so, for the month of August we have…
Exclusive Bartholomew promos!
Can you remember what they do?
“Magic used to be something between the guys down at the paper mill.”
“It’s been a long time since then. I miss my kids.”
“Get off my lawn.”
