Kim Jong Un Announces Successful Test of New EDH Deck

Posted on Monday, October 23rd, 2017 by ToadBrews
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Posted in mtg, News

Kim Jong Un, Supreme leader of North Korea, has issued the following press statement:

“I have designed and tested a glorious and unstoppable new combo, which the senile judge Sheldon Menery will be helpless to defeat. It is so simple a child could win with it, but so brilliant and intricate that only a living god could bring it to fruition! I have chosen as my commander the legendary Phelddagrif, a true democratic people’s champion. Phelddagrif allows me to assemble a powerful combination of tutors, draw spells, and ramp effects to bring the full and terrible power of my combo to bear!

“Allow me, briefly, to explain its full potential: The heart of the combination is this majestic Korean foil Triskelion, in gem mint condition. See how it catches the light. After the Triskelion has been summoned, I will then cast this Chinese foil Doubling Season. Also gem mint, and protected by a full three layers of sleeves! The final piece of the combo is this Russian Rite of Passage. It is not foil, but even now I have a literal army scouring the finest shops in the glorious People’s Republic for a foil one.

“You see, with all these pieces laid out, I have fully assembled a winning position! Very soon I expect to use this devastating combo in a real game, for the highest stakes imaginable! Sheldon, the feckless dotard, might try to stop me with his beloved Krosan Grip, but look!”

At this, The Korean leader turned over his deck to reveal a Privileged Position, altered to show him riding a dragon while laying waste to what appeared to be Wizards of the Coast headquarters. “The incredible power of these cards was immediately evident to me, and when I was able to secure the Russian and Chinese cards from sources which will for now remain anonymous, I knew then that my destiny was before me!”

The EDH rules committee says they have no plans to ban Triskelion, Doubling Season, or Rite of Passage; but reminds players that Commander is a casual format and individual playgroups may ban or unban cards as they wish.