RENTON — Yesterday, gaming company Wizards of the Coast shocked millions by issuing functional errata on Magic: the Gathering card [card]Sorrow's Path[/card], last printed in The Dark in 1994. Rules Manager Mark Gottlieb explained the reason for the update:
“Sorrow’s Path predated half-line spaces between abilities, so when looking at the actual card, there was no way to tell whether this was all a single activated ability or the first three lines were an activated ability and the last three lines were a separate triggered ability.”
The card will now contain a triggered ability that will function whenever it becomes tapped, rather than only when the activated ability is played.
Already, Legacy players are insisting that every decklist must now begin:
|
[deck]4 Sorrow's Path
4 Political Trickery 4 Vedalken Plotter 4 Mole Worms [/deck] |
Errata on older cards that seriously affects their playability is not new. Prior to the Portal sets’ becoming legal in Eternal formats, they received modern Oracle text, and Legacy and Vintage players everywhere were shocked to learn that [card]Zodiac Dragon[/card]’s ability no longer triggered whenever the hell you wanted. Fans of putting cards on other cards were devastated when [card]Cold Storage[/card] was updated, to avoid the philosophical problem that would arise if you attempted to put an animated Cold Storage on top of itself. And no one has any idea anymore what [card]Time Vault[/card] does these days.
Perhaps most famous was the functional change issued to the popular and well-known Mirage rare [card]Flash[/card] prior to Grand Prix Columbus. Questioned on the timing, Gottlieb responded, “It was important to us to get the card fixed as soon as we learned about it. We needed to restore the card to its original intent of allowing a player to search for any number of creature cards with total converted mana cost 6 or less and put them into play, or choose a land of each basic land type, then destroy those lands, then choose a land of each basic land type, then destroy those lands. Man, an instant for two mana? What were those Mirage designers thinking?”
The impact of the new Sorrow’s Path remains to be seen, but at press time, all major online retailers appeared to be sold out of both it and [card]Rune of Protection: Lands[/card].
Similarly angry was Jim Conway, an auto mechanic. “They called me a ‘mechanist,’” grunted the 43-year-old faerie while cynically pronouncing “mechanist” with an effeminate lisp. “Sounds like a job for homos,” he concluded, referring to the fact that many Homo-Nuclei are mechanists.
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The DCI Banned and Restricted List announcement was released today. To the relief of many Magic players, particularly fans of Standard Faeries and Extended Elves, there were no changes. But to one man, Monsieur Le Chiffre, it was the worst news imaginable.
Only days ago, Le Chiffre’s bedroom in the basement of his mother’s house was littered with tall stacks of Blossoms and Glimpses on loan from clients. But he sold them all on eBay expecting them to be banned and to rebuy them at a discount. Now they may jump even higher in price. “It’s just not fair!” Le Chiffre wailed as he dabbed his scarred eye with a hankerchief, his face all scrunched up like an upset baby.
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News of a new “Planeswalker Deck” similar to the one piloted by Themistoklis Panagiotaras to victory at