A study published in this month’s issue of The Journal Dominarian Alchemy finds that 97.6% of eldrazi spawn do not survive infancy. Here to explain this shocking statistic is lead researcher Figdab Bibblebob.
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“Like, are you really telling me that 20 squires could kill that dude with no help?”
—Uber_Mexico, regarding Kozilek, Butcher of Truth
We were planning on spoiling a new ROE card today, as part of our ROE alliance with WOTC! But… something terrible has happened!
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No, this half doesn’t go in the box. The other half goes in the box. Make sure you fill it out in case you have to leave before they draw the numbers. They might call you rather than draw another ticket.
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As any young girl across our great plane will tell you, the Eldrazi invasion is the most exciting thing to hit Zendikar in millenia. Lately though, a rift has formed between their fans, much like the rift between dimensions that allowed the Old Ones to slip their sorcerous bonds. That’s right, as the coming apocalypse draws ever-nearer, Eldraziacs have become fiercely divided on the most important question it poses: Which elder god is the dreamiest? In this special report, we hear from people on both sides of the issue.
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Hard Kor Badass 
