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  • The Last Jelly Moose




    “This is the story of the last Jelly Moose. Once there were many Jelly Meese. Jelly Mooses. Game-Trail Changelings. Once there were many Game-Trail Changelings. The covered the plains of Lorwyn, crowded the forests, swam through the swamps. But one day, something changed. Somethings changed. The Jelly Mooses stopped encountering regular Mooses. We figured the elves had hunted them all. Eventually, they would meet a turtle, or a goose, or a kithkin. And then, Blam! No more Jelly Moose. Just another turtleshell changeling, or avian changeling, or mistmeadow skulk.

    “So one by one, the Jelly Mooses stopped showing up. First, you would see a couple every day. Then, one a day. Then you’d maybe see them every couple of days, maybe on weekends, then just special occasions like your anniversary or birthday. Then you walk in and see her Jelly moosing with some goddamn pretty-boy elf and then…

    “Never mind. Never mind all that. The last Jelly Moose, that’s why you’re here. So eventually, you would only see a Jelly Moose once a year, if you were lucky. You’d be talking with someone, and they’d claim to have seen a Jelly Moose only days earlier. Nobody believed them, of course. I mean, we all knew people were seeing them still. Hell, some of us still saw them occasionally. But we were seeing them less and less. Some Hunters who specialized in eyeblights might see a Jelly Moose a couple of times a week, but, I mean, who wants to specialize in eyeblights.

    “So, then, we just stopped seeing them altogether. We would meet every week at the shimmering grotto to hang out and play a game, but nobody talked about Jelly Moose anymore. Ocasionally someone would make a joke about ‘Jelly Moose knuckles’ or ‘chocolate Moose’ but we rarely laughed. It hurt too much, you know?

    “But then everything changed. The whole world got turned upside down, got darker. Nobody else noticed, but we did. Maybe because we were already dead inside. And then, it happened. On the way home from a crib swap meet, I saw it. A Moose. An honest to Vigor Moose. It caught my scent, and started to run, but I had just bumped into a Springjack and I took off after it. I mean, we were both hauling more ass than a anarchist giant soapmaker, but I was faster. I caught it. And I felt myself changing. I sprouted antlers, my legs grew longer. I turned green. I gained trample. It was amazing. Trample! I had trample! If you’re not a changeling you won’t understand, but lemme tell you, gaining trample is the best thing in the world.

    “I felt whole. I felt complete. I was a 4/4 green trampler with changeling. I was a Jelly Moose. I was the last Jelly Moose. This may be the end of Lorwyn as we know it, but man, I feel fine.“

  • ‘Chop: NOM NOM NOM

  • Second Shadowmoor Preview Booster Surfaces

    There was a lot of buzz when the Shadowmoor Preview Booster appeared on magicthegathering.com. It piqued a lot of players’ interest, but it also raised a lot of questions. What was going on with Beseech the Queen? What was up with all the hybrid mana? Would that spider get that bunny?

    I have been leaked a second Shadowmoor teaser booster and I wanted you, the good people of GoodGamery.com to be the first to see it. Without further ado…

    Behold!

  • Wizards Announces Shadowmoor Theme Song

    Hasbro subsidiary Wizards of the Coast today unveiled a new marketing scheme that will accompany the release of the next stand-alone expansion to their popular Magic: The Gathering (MtG) card game, called Shadowmoor. This new set brings back a concept not seen en masse since the Ravnica block: cards that have more than one way to pay their casting cost. This introduces a number of challenges for would-be players, while at the same time introducing deckbuilding flexibility. To help get players — new and old alike — excited about this mechanic, Wizards has tapped popular recording artist Josh Groban to write and perform a thematically appropriate song that champions Shadowmoor.

    With Groban’s work complete, Mark Rosewater (a Wizards employee) has released the final version of the song in anticipation of release week. He said that he hopes that the song will be “bigger than that Numa song.” To this end, Wizards has begun contacting some familiar Youtube.com stars in the hopes that they will generate parody videos. He has also asked members of GoodGamery.com, a wildly popular gaming website frequented by rabid Magic players, to head to Youtube and click on the song’s video to keep it on the “favorites” list.

    Here then, are the lyrics to the song.

    “O Casting Cost” by Josh Groban

    (Sung to the tune of “O Christmas Tree”)

    Oh casting cost, oh casting cost, how shall I pay for thee?

    Oh casting cost, oh casting cost, how shall I pay for thee?

    In play I have two swamps, a plains, can I now cast ‘Curse of Chains’?

    Oh casting cost, oh casting cost, how shall I pay for thee?

    Oh curse you Mark, oh my sore head, how did he ever pay for those?

    Oh wait I know, oh now I’m dead, three Demigods: I am hosed

    You tap a swamp, and I can’t tell, the color of, your creature spell

    Oh casting cost, oh casting cost, how shall I pay for thee?

    I have to think, which I despise, I should have quit after revised

    Oh casting cost, oh casting cost, how shall I pay for thee?

    Generally regarded as possessing an incredible voice and knack for writing, and with one of the best-selling Christmas albums in recent memory, this is not what Josh Groban’s fans have come to expect. When asked about the song, Groban said that he “put time in commensurate to what I was paid. And in reality, I know nothing about the game. Is it related to those Pokemon toys?” One can only hope that more time (and money) was put into designing Shadowmoor than was put into marketing it, but considering a major theme is recycled, prospects do not look good.

    (or do they! – paz, ‘Grobaniac’)

  • Shadowmoor Nights, Part I

    Forget it, Sid. It’s Shadowmoor.

    Sid Burns reclined on his darksteel armchair, tapped a mountain, and lit his cigar against his forehead. Bitter, too bitter; but the way business was going lately, Tattermunges were the best he could afford. The chair wasn’t comfortable either, but he needed something that could survive his temper. He fished out a bottle of Ballynock from his desk drawer and took a swig. It burned. At least something still worked.

    The flamekin private detective’s office had seen better days. Back when Ingrid, his kithkin secretary, was still working there, the place had been spotless. She was a good kid. Then she went missing, and Sid next found her at the bottom of a five-toed grave. Sid tracked down the giant responsible, but, favor of the mighty being what it was, he couldn’t deal even 1 damage and would have ended up in the graveyard if he’d tried.

    Things weren’t the same after that, and soon his business started to fall off. Now, it was all Sid could do to burn through his cheap boggart-made cigars and work his way to the bottom of his last bottle of Ballynock single malt.

    A knock on the door derailed his train of thought. The veil of cigar smoke parted to reveal the tall, lithe figure of an elf. One look at her, and Sid got +2/+0. The color of her deep brown eyes, the sheen of her long hair, the gentle curve of her horns: this one was a knockout, and the -1/-1 from the smoke made her features all the more delicate. Sid knew she was trouble—there were only two kinds of elves, and green creatures don’t wear dresses like that—but he didn’t care.

    He said: “Won’t you sit down, Miss?”

    “Larissa,” she replied as she sat down. “Larissa de Feuilledor.”

    Sid gestured toward the Ballynock still on his desk, but she shook her head. She was trying to look strong, but Sid figured she only had 1 toughness left. She smiled, poured herself a double, and took a long drink. All moonglove, this one.

    “What can this eyeblight do for you, Miss de Feuilledor?”

    She considered her answer. The building was quiet at this late hour, and Sid could hear the cackles of caterwauling boggarts from somewhere down the street. This wasn’t the kind of neighborhood that could expect warren-scourge patrols, and that meant gangs of boggarts coming out nightly to set tarfires and pursue all manner of shenanigans. Just as Sid began to wonder whether she’d heard him, Larissa spoke up, this time in a soft voice that forced him to lean toward her.

    “Could you—?” She looked downward, then shot Sid a captivating glance, moving so close that his heat became almost painful. The words spilled out: “It’s about my sister, Tess. She moved here with her new husband, Jack. She’s not like me— They were… Are. Good creatures. Green creatures. I don’t know why, but he started working for a merrow, Conrad Finn. He’d work late, and she’d call me up, crying that this time he wouldn’t make it home. One night, she turned out to be right. The cloudgoat rangers discovered the body in such bad condition that they couldn’t even make out his subtype: if not for his veteran’s armaments at the crime scene, she might never have figured out it was him. Of course, when she saw the pictures (he’d been hit with a volley of shards and then inverted), she couldn’t take it. I warned her what that meant: someone wanted him dead and bad enough to take a one-for-three, but she wouldn’t listen. She went to Finn’s place in the Hotel Juzam. I heard that she’d been pounding on Finn’s door, screaming at him from the hallway, and they had to have security bounce her. Nobody’s seen her in play since then. She’s a one-drop; she’s never been away this long.”

    Larissa’s composure started to crack. Sid handed her the handkerchief from his suit’s front pocket, careful not to set it alight. He put his hand on her shoulder as she sobbed gently. If this was an act, Sid thought, she was good enough to play the Ancient Amphitheater.

    “Miss de Feuilledor,” he finally asked, “how long ago was this?”

    “It’s been six— No, seven turns now. You don’t think she’s been discarded?”

    “Let’s not jump to conclusions, Miss—“

    “Larissa. Please call me Larissa.”

    “Miss de Feuilledor,” Sid contined. “She might be hiding out from removal. I’ve heard of Mr. Finn, and he’s the kind of merrow who’s put the scare into 4/4’s, let alone one-drops like your sister. I’ll tell you what, though, I’ll start looking for her this turn.”

    “Thank you. And about payment?”

    “Three red mana per turn, plus expenses.”

    “Of course. I’ll have to stop by the Grotto. You’ll understand if I don’t carry red mana on me.”

    She meant the Springleaf Drum, but Sid was too polite to correct her. A broad like her could have any color of mana she wanted, as long as she was willing to tap herself to get it. Hard times had kept Sid away from the Drum, but he knew the kind of girls they had there—long on legs, short on scruples—and he doubted that the Grotto would let Larissa in, even to filter her mana.

    She returned the handkerchief to Sid, and strode out of his office. Her scent lingered, which Sid finally recognized as black lotus. Her sister might have been a one-drop, but she wouldn’t come cheap. Her story was almost convincing, but this business about the husband didn’t add up: to have been killed like that, he either had at least four toughness, or someone was taking card disadvantage to send a message. Whatever he’d gotten himself into, it was bad news. Sid drank another Ballynock, then followed Larissa into the night.

    *****

    Sid knew the way to the Hotel Juzam. He arrived outside just to see a frustrated kithkin shaking his fist upwards. Some faerie had stolen his hat, and were playing a game of Frisbee with it around the fourth story, illuminated by the hotel’s neon sign. He looked about ready to do something, but, apparently having thought the better of it, just shouted a curse and left. The flamekin have an expression: “You may as well try to swat a faerie.” It means “impossible.” Sid didn’t know what a white creature was doing in this part of town, but at least he had the sense to run off before he lost more than just his headgear.

    Sid approached the front desk. He heard a distant melody coming from the bar, but he didn’t have much interest in the music when there were no other flamekin around. He’d attracted other attention, though: from the corner of his eye, a squat boggart wearing a spiderwig looked up from his newspaper to stare. Sid got Finn’s room number from the desk, slipping the boy a generic mana. He took the stairs up, and, hearing footsteps, he ducked into an alcove and waited until the boggart passed. Sid noticed an ill-concealed Thornbite Staff under the boggart’s suit. He snuck behind the boggart and tapped him. That boggart wouldn’t be a problem until next turn, but, to be safe, he also shattered the staff.

    After a knock on the door, another rough-looking boggart let him in without saying a word. Sid didn’t think much of boggart goons: most of them would sacrifice their own aunties just for +2/+2. Still, he had to be wary of anyone who had enough cards not to worry about his flunkies ending up in the graveyard.

    The boggart seemed to be leading him into the bathroom, but just as Sid was about to ask a question, he noticed the huge bathtub full of water, holding the fattest merrow he had ever seen. His chubby fingers were clawing at a changeling steak, which metamorphosed into a different meal with every bite. Sid shuddered, as the food briefly took a form resembling his own face in between shifting from a potato to crème brulee. The boggart poured Sid a glass of wine from the merrow’s bottle; the wine was cheaper than he’d expected, but it steadied his nerves.

    “Welcome, Mr. Burns,” the merrow drawled. “I am Conrad Finn. I understand you’ve been looking for me. I sent Miss de Feuilledor over because I knew you’d head right here.” Sid was about to speak up, but Finn put a hand up and continued. “You’ve had some business with a mutual friend,” Finn laughed, “He told me that you’d never come if I asked. So I sent that elf over, and here you are. Did you like her story? Someone makes trouble, who should know better than to make trouble, who was warned not to make trouble. Then the troublemaker disappears.”

    Finn stuck his finger into Sid’s glass, making a whirlpool motion in the wine. At the same time, the room around him began to spin.

    “You could say I’m an expert in making things disappear. Of course, I wanted to see who could make trouble for our mutual friend, first.”

    Sid’s image once again appeared on the changeling steak, before settling on rack of lamb. Finn tore off a piece, chewed, and swallowed.

    “I’m not impressed. I don’t think Miss de Feuilledor would really have first-picked you anyway. A good detective would have known better. How do you like the wine? It’s a Pestermite.”

    Sid collapsed.

    *****

    Sid untapped to find himself tied to a dolmen. He looked over to see an enormous foot, which he recognized as belonging to Hugo Rhodes, the giant who’d murdered his secretary. As he struggled, he heard a voice, high above him, laughing.

    TO BE CONTINUED

  • PS Goblins Yu: GP Philadelphia Report

    For a month or two, I had been playtesting Goblins extensively (for the PTQ season, obviously).

    After 0-2ing the Richmond PTQ, and winning the GPT that started after round 2 (lol 0-2 drop!),
    I come up with a pretty optimal list of Goblins after talking to Brad Taulbee (who managed to make
    it to two PTQ finals, losing to Aggro Loam both times).

    Of course, what would any good Magic article be without a decklist?

    The Sparksmith got added in to beat Tarmogoyfs/Myr Enforcers/Dorans, etc. I felt having 4 Goblin Matron
    was too slow many a time, especially with the number of Cabal Therapies running around (see Dredge/Doran).

    Before the tournament arrives, about a week in advance, I ship Tristal a Domain Zoo list, which he proceeds
    to smash face with! {e}

    Round 1-3: Byes,

    walking around the venue, meeting up with various Maryland players, and Tristal and RobRoy.

    Round 4: Christopher R. Schaut.

    I recognize this guy from the last Rockville PTQ, where he played my friend Hans Mahler in an Ideal mirror, so I auto-put him on Ideal.

    Game 1: He wins the die roll, and casts a turn 2 Form of the Dragon off a sacland and double Seething Song. I proceed to sharpshooter him for 5 damage on turn 4 (while being at 5!)

    Sideboarding: -4 Gempalm, -1 Ringleader, -1 Sparksmith, +3 Therapy, +3 grip

    Game 2: He keeps a weird hand (i think, 3 sacland, wish, 2*prism, star). I therapy him for Sensei Top, because his first play is a sacland, and I don’t really want him recovering from my Therapies. On my turn 2, I lay a Mogg War Marshal, flashback therapy to hit both his prisms, in the meantime, he has drawn another burning wish. The next turn, I Earwig Squad him for 2 confinements and a form, and note that he doesn’t play top, instead playing insidious dreams/draco/explosion.


    However, the game ends pretty quickly after that since he is taking 6 per turn.

    Round 5: Robert E. Moore.

    He is playing some sort of dumb Leaf-Crowned Elder deck (apparently he only had 1 bye, so he managed to win 3 rounds in a row!).

    Game 1: He triggers Elder about 6 times, getting Eternal Witness, Doran, Troll Ascetic, but multiple ringleaders just bash him in combo with a pyromancer.

    Sideboarding: +3 grip, -3 Fanatic

    Game 2: The same thing happens, but he Engineered Plagues for goblin, but I have a goblin king in play, so he still dies to pyromancer.

    Round 6: Christian Calcano.

    He is playing Doran with maindeck Jitte ;_;

    Game 1: It is a fairly tense game that goes back and forth. I Gempalm two early goyfs, and have a bunch of 1/1s in play, but he eventually gets Doran/Shizo/Jitte, and I lose.

    Sideboarding: +3 therapy, -1 Matron, -2 piledriver

    Game 2: I keep his Jitte in check with Skirk Prospector, so he bites it to a lot of 1/1 tokens.

    Game 3: He gets turn 2 doran, turn 3 vindicate, turn 4 witness ;_;

    I was pretty pissed after this match, because I don’t think he could have won game 1 without drawing his singleton Shizo.

    Round 7: BENJI ASHMAN (AKA FAKEHAT!)

    Game 1: Fakehat obvobvobv draws it afgain, and combos me on turn 4.

    Sideboarding: +3 therapy, +2 Grip, -4 gempalm, -1 sparksmith

    Game 2: I threaten lethal on my turn 4, so he has to wish on turn 3 for pyroclasm, then later fizzles on a desire for 6.

    Game 3: He mulligans to 5 and puts up no fight.

    Round 8: Jason Imperiale

    Dredge idiot, and I know this from reading mtg.com :-p He is also kind of a douche.

    Game 1: I obvobvobv lose because he has early darkblast and dredging.

    Sideboarding: +4 Extirpate, +3 Earwig, -2 Piledriver, -1 Matron, -2 Ringleader, -1 Pyromancer, -1 Tin Street


    Game 2: He mulls to 5, and I just roll him on turn 4 with the 2 piledrivers I left in.

    Game 3: He keeps a 7 card hand, but does nothing for the first few turns. I correctly put him on darkblast, when all he does is fetch up 2 watery graves. I finally play into his darkblast so I can extirpate it, and earwig him for 3 narcs, then 2 dread return and an ichorid.


    He starts bitching and whining about how lucky and terrible I am to not do anything early and he eventually decks when he can’t make it past my fanatics.

    Round 9: Nicolas J. Cuenca

    Goblins mirror!

    Game 1: He gets stuck on 3 mana, whereas I don’t miss land drops and resolve several ringleaders which end the game in short order.

    Game 2: He gets stuck on 3 mana again, but my hand is kind of slow, so I start cabal therapying him to try to stay alive, and eventually draw my one goblin king to lethal him with my mogg tokens.

    End of day 1.

    I am pretty excited because I am 8-1, so I am in relatively good shape to at least money, if not top 8.

    Round 10: Zack Hall

    U/W tron. I put this guy on a tron strategy, since he obviously did well in Vancouver with it.

    Game 1: He wins the die roll, and leads with a power plant, and chrome mox imprinting condescend. I play a fanatic into his represented counterspell, and sure enough it gets remanded.

    He trons up on turn 3, so I get slavered on turn 4, and he gets the lock on turn 5 by a transmuted tolaria west.

    Sideboarding: -4 Mogg Fanatic, -1 Sparksmith, -2 Gempalm, +3 Cabal Therapy, +3 Krosan Grip (I leave in 2 gempalms, for triskelion so I can attack past it).

    Game 2: He mulligans to 5, and my draw involves: turn 1, land mox, imprint gempalm, piledriver, turn 2, warchief, turn 3 ringleader. That doesn’t last long, even though he plays a sphere of law on turn 3 from a turn 3 signet.

    Game 3: He keeps a slow hand, and I get early pressure. He eventually taps low to oblivion ring a piledriver, so I sneak out a warchief. The next turn, he lays a sphere of law, then I untap and pyromancer him for exactly enough through the sphere.

    Round 11: Joshua Schneier

    Blue Counterbalance variant with Engineered Plagues.

    Game 1: I win the dieroll, lay turn 1 prospector, turn 2 sparksmith. He reads the card carefully and slumps back in his chair as he starts laying tarmogoyfs only to see them sparksmithed to death. Not close at all.

    Sideboarding: -4 Mogg Fanatic, -1 Pyromancer, +3 Krosan Grip, +2 Dralnu’s Crusade

    Game 2: He force spikes my prospector, counterspells my piledriver, then lays a plague. I die to tarmogoyfs shortly after.

    Game 3: My hand is ok, I resolve a piledrive ron turn 2, then start laying some small guys like moggs, and he draws 7 fetchlands in a row and dies.

    At this point, I’m extremely psyched, since I only need to 2-1 the next 3 rounds to top 8.

    Round 12: Matt Hansen.

    Cymbro #2, obvobvobv.

    Game 1: I draw a tonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn of lands, like 6 after I keep an opener of 3 lands, mogg fanatic, prospector, piledriver.

    Sideboarding: -1 Tin Street Hooligan, -2 SKirk Prospector, +3 Krosan Grip

    Game 2: I get an early sparksmith, which contains his guys long enough for me to piledriver him to death.

    Game 3: I commit the WORST blunder ever, which probably costs me the game. My board is, goblin king, sparksmith, prospector, piledriver, his board is only a chameleon colossus, and he is tapped out.

    All I need to do is sparksmith his colossus (since it would take 5 damage since it counts all goblins in play). Instead, I convince myself that I need to sparksmith it and fanatic it. So I lose a fanatic for no reason
    which would have been instrumental in keeping his 2nd phantom centaur under control so it would not get cloaked*2.

    Instead I lose to that centaur, and Hansen goes on to top 8.

    Round 13: Michael Mushaty.

    Counterbalance idiot #2

    Game 1: I get a fast draw, and roll him, while he does dumb stuff like repeal my chrome mox 3 times.

    Sideboarding: –

    Game 2: He plays an early goyf, then a forge-tender, then another goyf. I can’t really do anything through his forge-tenders and goyfs, because gempalm incinerator is basically dead.

    Game 3: I draw all of my chrome moxen, after keeping a hand with land, land, mox, piledriver, warchief, prospector. He then repeals my mox on his turn 1. After which, he proceeds to go goyf, forge-tender, shackles. At some point, he shackles my mogg war marshal, and chooses to untap his shackles and STEAL THE SAME MOGG WAR MARSHAL AGAIN.

    Round 14: Dean C. Bilz

    TEPS guy #2.

    Game 1: Comboed on turn 4, when he was gonna die on my turn 4, but he won the die roll ;[

    Game 2: I am pretty sure that I can’t dodge the bullet again and win this matchup, but in game 2, I decide to matron for a ringleader, whereas if I matron for a mogg fanatic, he just dies.

    Round 15: Daniel OMahoney-Schwartz

    I recognize his name, since he is one of the 3 people part of Team Antarctica, so I know he is probably pretty good.
    He is playing Domain Zoo.

    Game 1: I clog the board with 3 mogg war marshals, then ghost quarter his temple garden, which strands his hand full of lightning helixes and vindicates, and shrinks his kird ape to a 1/1.

    Game 2: He gets turn 1 ape, turn 2 goyf, turn 3 jitte/tarfire a guy of mine. I lose this one pretty handily.

    Game 3: I get turn 1 prospector, turn 2 mogg war marshal which keeps his jitte in check while I build up a critical mass of goblins to goblin king him to death.

    All-in all, it’s a pretty good tournament for me, and playtesting paid off in spades, giving me 2 pro points, and 400 dollars.

    If I had won one more match, I would have qualified for hollywood, but this is not too bad of a performance for my 3rd GP ever.


    Looking at the pre-rotation decklist, we can see that a few cards are lost for the next season of extended.

    In particular, Goblin Matron and Goblin Ringleader disappear from the maindeck, as well as Dralnu’s Crusade and Cabal Therapy from the sideboard.

    Looking from Onslaught/MDF type 2 for goblins, we can either run clickslither, or siege-gang commander.

    In particular, I would restructure the deck in the following way:

    My gut-feeling is that post rotation, Affinity and Tron will be HUGE. You need sprees vs affinity and maindeck sparksmith as a 4-of helps a lot vs them. Grip is an uncounterable way of killing their titans or platinums. Clickslither is a hasty trampling threat that is hard to deal with.

  • Shadowmoor Preview Month Contest


    The Aurora has plunged Lorwyn into eternal night, transforming the once-idyllic plane into the eerie world of Shadowmoor. The gloom has transformed its denizens, too — creatures of fable have become monsters from dark fairytales. Races and characters introduced in Lorwyn are back, but with twisted allegiances and new powers.

    Shut up! We’ve got no time for such nonsense, “Wizards of the Coast”. That’s because this is Shadowmoor Preview Month, and it would be inappropriate for us here at Good Gamery to let such a thing pass by without acknowledging it with an AMAZING HUMOROUS CONTENT SUBMISSION CONTEST.

    I literally hear you asking, “How will this contest work?” Every piece of Officially Acknowledged Content you create during April counts toward your standing in the contest, as long as one of those pieces of content is a Shadowmoor-related humor article. When April ends, everyone will vote for which person deserves to win the contest based on the quantity and/or quality of his or her submissions over the course of the month. One fantastic article could win it. A dozen “pretty funny” items could win it. Even non-funny content, like tournament reports and strategy articles, can contribute to your victory. It’s up to the plebes!

    The person who wins first place in the vote wins an entire box of Shadowmoor booster packs. Second place wins 18 Shadowmoor booster packs. Third place wins 9 Shadowmoor booster packs. Fourth place wins 3 Shadowmoor booster packs. These prizes have been donated by the MT2 New Contest Crew — thanks guys!

    So what are you waiting for? Your mommy to nag you? Shut up! We’ve got no time for such nonsense. Get that content created, because gobs of free Magic cards are at stake, jabroni!

    (“How do I submit articles?”)

  • Spell Snare

  • Leaked Info About Next Smash Bros. Game

    Though Super Smash Bros. Brawl was just released two weeks ago, Good Gamery has discovered that Nintendo is already hard at work on the sequel: “Super Smash Bros. Altercation.” Today we’ll be looking at a few of the new characters that have been leaked.




    Peppy

    Peppy features the fastest wheelchair based attacks in the game. His final smash is “summon orderly.”




    The Black M.C. Kid

    Named Mac, the black M.C. Kid loves McDonald’s and sports the hairdo popularized by Kid from Kid & Play. His final smash involves touching a crescent moon block, which turns his skin white.




    Krystal

    Krystal is rather similar to Wolf, Falco, and Fox. Her final smash is the landmaster furry stampede which calls forth dozens of creepy nerds lacking in hygiene and social aptitude that will destroy everything in their wake.




    Every Single Pokemon

    “Due to popular demand, we’ve gotta include ’em all!” says Nintendo. Unlock them with only 10,000 hours of gameplay, far less than it would take to catch your own.




    Giygas

    This “Earthbound” character is a bit tricky to play due to the form of his attacks being incomprehensible.




    Cloud

    While it’s true that Final Fantasy 7 has never appeared on any Nintendo platform, Nintendo reminds us that they have worked with Square, and “that should suffice.” Cloud’s limit break final smash is the emoslash.




    Fighter

    Another inclusion from the Final Fantasy universe, Fighter can barely move, but merely stepping forward allows him to attack any character no matter how distant.



    The Entire Cast of DragonBall Z

    What do Nintendo and DragonBall have in common? “Nothing, but we included these guys anyway,” our source explained. Few details are known at this point, but DragonBall characters are most notable for the fact that their attack power increases the longer they yell.

  • Greatness

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    greatnessblurrym