Tag: Good Gamery

  • The Zen of Flores

    Flores presents his student with a d20. “I want you to use this in your next game of Magic,” Flores says.

    The student asks, “What is it for?”

    Flores replies, “This is a misplay die. Every time you make a misplay, you must increase the number on the die.”

    The student asks, “Why does the misplay die start at 1?”

    Flores replies, “Because using this die is your first misplay.”

    A monk asks Mike Flores, “Does Jund have a beatdown nature?”

    Flores replies, “No.”

    The monk says, “Many decks with Goblin Guide, Lightning Bolt, and Thoughtseize are beatdown. Why not Jund?”

    Flores replies, “Jund does not run One with Nothing.”

    Flores, a deck master during the Dojo era (1995-2001), received a university professor who came to inquire about Card Advantage.

    Flores was drawing cards. He drew cards until his hand was full, and then kept on drawing.

    The professor watched the overflow until he no longer could restrain himself. “It is overfull. No more will go in!”

    “Like this hand,” Flores said, “you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Card Advantage unless you first empty your hand?”

    A student asks Flores, “How can I learn to cast spells as well as you?”

    Flores responds, “Let us play a game of Magic, so that you may begin to learn.”

    The student selects a simple burn deck to play against his master. Every turn the student cast a direct damage spell against Flores. Meanwhile, every turn Flores draws a card, thinks for several moments, and then plays an Island and passes the turn.

    As the game goes on, the student becomes increasingly convinced that Flores will end the game with some miraculous flurry of spells. But on the last turn of the game, the student casts a Lightning Bolt for Flores’s final three points of life and, after thinking for a moment, Flores says that he has no response.

    The student is incensed. “What am I supposed to learn from a game where you did nothing but play Islands every turn,” he exclaims.

    Flores responds calmly, “Before you can learn to cast spells, you must learn to play lands.”

    One day Chapin came to Flores and asked, “What is true innovation?”

    “True innovation”, replied Flores, “is finding 74 cards and adding Gnarled Mass.”

    If you want to make your spells work for you, first you must work for your spells.

    Before you can win the game against your opponent, you have to win the game against yourself.

    “Know your opponent and yourself, and you will not be defeated in one hundred matches, except when you are mana screwed.” -Mike Flores

    “If I had more time, I would have written a shorter decklist.” -Mike Flores

    The student once asked Flores, “Why do we set our clocks forward in the spring only to set them back again in autumn?”

    Flores responded, “Daylight Saving Time is a virtual Time Walk.”

  • Flavor Text Quiz: Real or Fake? #1

    Magic’s flavor text is one of the most important parts of what makes a Magic card what it is. Besides helping to flesh out the fictional worlds of the Multiverse, flavor text can also bring characters to life in memorable ways, or allow the designers of the game to sneak in some humor and whimsy into their grimdark fantasy realms. Is your inner Vorthos ready to take a dip in the sweet sweet waters of Lake Flavor Text? Prepare yourself for the ultimate flavor text challenge: Are the flavor texts below real or fake? Scroll down to begin!

    ______________________________

    #1. Basic senses like sight and taste are reserved for those in power.

    #2. There’s more than one way to crack a skull.

    #3. “I’m in charge now!”

    #4. “I could promise you a quick death. But it would be a lie.”

    #5. “Once more into Devil’s Breach, soldiers. I want another devil tail for my collection.”

    #6. With Tezzeret judging, the Inventors’ Fair is anything but.

    #7. Go big and go home.

    #8. “Your creations are effective, Sheoldred, but we must unite the flesh, not merely flay it.”
    — Elesh Norn, Grand Cenobite

    #9. It has two paws and one maw.

    #10. “Show them. Show them how hot your fire can burn.”
    — Liliana Vess, to Chandra Nalaar

    #11. “Smarter than death? Let’s see you outsmart my mace, necromancer!”

    #12. There are two punishments in en-Kor culture, to be burned, or to be spurned. Every en-Kor has chosen to be burned without hesitation.

    #13. She’ll make you a deal you can’t refuse. And if you do refuse it, she’ll make you another deal. One you’ll wish you could refuse.

    #14. “You keep talking, but the only words I’m hearing are ‘go’ and ‘fast’.”

    #15. Bores ruin a party. Boars are party to ruin.

    #16. “I will join you so that you will not yet join me.”

    #17. It is the thing that goes bump in the night.

    #18. “When the world is running down, you make the best of what’s still around.”

    #19. Their language may be a cacophonous agglomeration of chittering snorts and mad barking, but the message they send is all too clear.

    #20. “Try this on for size!”

    ______________________________

    Answer key:

    #1. This one is REAL. It’s on Phyrexian Revoker, from the set New Phyrexia.
    #2. This one is FAKE.
    #3. This one is FAKE.
    #4. This one is FAKE.
    #5. This one is REAL. It’s on Thraben Valiant, from Avacyn Restored.
    #6. This one is FAKE.
    #7. This one is FAKE.
    #8. This one is REAL. It’s on Skinrender, from Scars of Mirrodin.
    #9. This one is FAKE.
    #10. This one is REAL. It’s on Diabolic Tutor, from Kaladesh.
    #11. This one is REAL. It’s on Ash Zealot, from Return to Ravnica.
    #12. This one is FAKE.
    #13. This one is FAKE.
    #14. This one is FAKE.
    #15. This one is REAL. It’s on Crashing Boars, from Exodus.
    #16. This one is REAL. It’s on Drogskol Shieldmate, from Eldritch Moon.
    #17. This one is REAL. It’s on Mindslicer, from Odyssey and Ninth Edition.
    #18. This one is FAKE.
    #19. This one is REAL. It’s on Heckling Fiends, from Dark Ascension and Conspiracy.
    #20. This one is FAKE.

    If you scored…

    16-20: You are the living embodiment of Vorthos! Or you work in the flavor text department. If you’re in the second group, hello!

    10-15: Your coin flipping worked to your benefit! I can think of one goblin it ain’t so lucky for.

    5-9: Your coin flipping worked out poorly! Are you the kind of goblin who’d lose their thumb in a wager, then come right back with “double or nothing”?

    0-4: You are fuel for the Magmaw! That’s not related to your performance on the quiz, it’s just a general fact.

  • Exclusive Unstable Preview!

    Those of you familiar with us know that there’s two things we love here at Good Gamery: Magic cards, and humor. So when we heard Unstable was coming out soon, we reached out to Wizards for a preview, and we got one!

    We’ve been asked to only show the back of this card but we’re sure you’ll agree it looks like it could be a very exciting card:

  • Rivals of Ixalan: Visual Spoiler

    Pirates and Dinosaurs? Why not both at the same time?

    IXALAN Logo

    IXALAN Logo
    View the stand-alone spoiler website!

  • Boat Leak? Rivals of Ixalan Sheet Discovered

    ORLANDO, FL — Early this morning, photos of an uncut sheet of Rivals of Ixalan were leaked on imgur.

    We contacted the leaker for an exclusive close-up glimpse of some of the new cards, seen below. More to come as this story develops.

    View the imgur album

  • Judge’s Corner #8

    Welcome back to our regular series Judge’s Corner, where we answer your Magic: the Gathering rules questions.

    Q: I suspect that my opponent is cheating. What should I do?

    A: If you think he’s cheating, here is what you should do: 1) identify your feelings; 2) tell him about your feelings; 3) take note of his reaction; 4) try to obtain physical evidence; 5) ask for the respect of honesty; 6) set boundaries for your self-care.

    Q: How does the Undying ability on Geralf’s Messenger work?

    A: When Geralf’s Messenger dies, if it didn’t already have a +1/+1 counter on it, it returns to the battlefield under its owner’s control and gains a +1/+1 counter. Since Geralf’s Messenger is a zombie, we can assume that it has already died before the card was printed; therefore, it is already on the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter by the time you start the game. The “target opponent loses 2 life” effect won’t apply at this time, since none of the players in the current game were your opponent at the time that Geralf’s Messenger entered the battlefield. Since Dark Ascension was printed five years ago, it is safe to assume that Geralf’s Messenger is untapped by the time the game starts.

    Q: I’ve occasionally seen cards that tell me to put “counters” on my cards. What should I use for counters?

    A: This depends on the type of counter called for:

    +1/+1 counters represent an increase in physical strength. We recommend pomegranate seeds, acorns, or nibs of dark chocolate.

    -1/-1 counters are a symbol of weakness; lemon drops, periwinkle shells, or shards of glass are more appropriate.

    Poison counters are best represented by dried flowers, a lock of hair, or a lie whispered into a lover’s ear.

    Q: My friend targeted my Yavimaya Barbarian and my Raging Goblin with Dead Ringers. I didn’t think either creature would be destroyed but my friend insisted that they were. Are they right?

    A: Yes, your friend is correct. As the controller of the Dead Ringers, your friend makes all choices associated with the spell, including which of the two targeted creatures is the “either one” referred to in the card text; since Raging Goblin is not a color that Yavimaya Barbarian isn’t, they both are destroyed.

    Q: Can I challenge a judge’s ruling?

    A: Yes! To challenge a judge’s ruling you must play a Magic subgame versus their “Judge Deck.” Beware: the higher the level of the judge, the more powerful the spells in their deck!

    Submit your questions to @goodgamery on Twitter using #judgescorner.

  • Judge’s Corner #7

    Welcome back to our regular series Judge’s Corner, where we answer your Magic: the Gathering rules questions.

    Q: I cast Mind Rot on my opponent, but they have no cards in hand. What happens?

    A: This is covered by Rule 609.3: “If an effect attempts to do something impossible, it does as much as possible.” For your opponent to be able to discard two cards, they must have two cards in hand, so they must first draw two cards, then discard them. If your opponent has fewer than two cards left in their library, they lose the game (see Rule 104.3c).

    Q: I was about to attack my opponent for 300 damage, but then rather than allow me to attack he just conceded. This is no fun! What can I do about it?

    A: This is an issue that Wizards is aware of and is working to resolve. In the meantime, we have issued an emergency ruling that allows you transfer over the 300 damage you would’ve done to the next game.

    Q: I was mana weaving my deck before a match (I always also riffle shuffle it three times, the mana weaving just makes me feel luckier) and my opponent called me a cheater. What should I do when this happens?

    A: Call a judge immediately. Players are not allowed to insult their opponents by calling them names: this is an example of Unsporting Conduct – Major.

    Q: My opponent has a Dark Confidant on the battlefield. During his upkeep, he reveals an extra card, but forgets to mark his life total down. After I point it out to him during the following turn, he claims it’s too late because it’s a “missed trigger.” My question is: what the heck is that?

    A: Missed triggers happen when one or more players forget to precede their game actions with what we call “trigger warnings.” It is the responsibility of each player to maintain the game state, so if you realize a game action will cause a trigger, warn your opponents so that they can choose to stop reading their card before the trigger occurs.

    Q: In a multiplayer game, an opponent and I both activate Mindslaver targeting a third player. Who controls that player’s next turn?

    A: You both do. Please refer to the Two-Headed Giant rules.

    Two Headed Giant of Foriys

    Submit your questions to @goodgamery on Twitter using #judgescorner.

  • Announcing… From the Vault: Magic: the Gathering: Online

    Magic Online has always been a source of great stories. Many named players on the Pro Tour got their start online, as well as many new players who use Magic Online as their starting point on a long journey to become the Multiverse’s greatest Planeswalker. However, often times cards work somewhat differently online as compared to their paper counterparts.

    From the Vault: Magic: the Gathering: Online is a collection of fifteen hallmark cards from Magic Online’s rich history, brought to life on paper cards with updated rules text and art to bring the questionably great experience of playing online to the offline world. Now you can play these iconic cards as the programmers designed, without having to look up online-specific errata.

  • Judge’s Corner #6

    Welcome back to our regular series Judge’s Corner, where we answer your Magic: the Gathering rules questions.

    Q: Can players decide the outcome of a tournament match by playing another game, such as Hearthstone?

    A: A match cannot be determined by a random method.

    Q: I saw a Mox Ruby the other day, and the type line says “Mono Artifact.” What does that mean?

    A: It means that Mox Ruby is restricted in Vintage.

    Q: What does “Until end of turn” mean?

    A: Turning a magic card is called “tapping.” So “until end of turn” lasts as long as it takes to turn a card 90 degrees.

    Q: The Eldritch Moon card Providence says that I may reveal it from my “opening hand” to make my life total 26. What is my “opening hand”?

    A: Pretend that you are unscrewing a pickle jar. One of your hands naturally holds the jar and the other turns the lid. The one turning the lid is your opening hand.

    Q: If there are no cards in either player’s graveyard, and I want to kill my opponent’s Tarmogoyf with a Blaze, what should X be?

    A: X should be silver, indicating that your Blaze is an uncommon card from Tenth Edition.

    Submit your questions to @goodgamery on Twitter using #judgescorner.

  • Judge’s Corner #5

    Welcome back to our weekly series Judge’s Corner, where we answer your Magic: the Gathering rules questions.

    Q: Can I regenerate Masticore after my opponent targets it with Pillage?

    A: Yes. The effect “it can’t be regenerated” only applies when Pillage resolves; while Pillage is on the stack you can still pay (2) to activate Masticore’s ability and give it a regeneration shield.

    Q: Does Unexpectedly Absent for 0 work?

    A: Yes, but only if the library has no cards in it. When you’re counting off from the top of the library, you start at the first card, so there can only be a zeroth card to put the permanent under if the library is empty.

    Q: I’ve read that if you have a Doubling Season in play and then play a Vivid Crag, the charge counters don’t get doubled. That seems very confusing to me. Can you explain why this is?

    A: Doubling Season says, “if an effect would place one or more counters on a permanent you control, it places twice that many of those counters on that permanent instead.” But when you put your Vivid Crag into play it’s not an effect that places counters on the land; it’s you that places counters on the land.

    Q: Relentless Rats is my favorite card. I’ve worked hard to collect a lot of them. Last week I brought my deck of Swamps and Relentless Rats to FNM only to have judge tell me that my deck wasn’t legal because Relentless Rats aren’t in Standard. But it says right there on the card that a deck can have any number of Relentless Rats! What gives?

    A: In general the rules text of a permanent card (such as the sentence “a deck can have any number of cards named Relentless Rats” on Relentless Rats) only functions while that card is in on the battlefield. Thus your deck is legal as long as you have a Relentless Rats on the battlefield, but when you start the game you don’t have any Rats on the battlefield and your deck is not legal. The judge made the right call.

    Q: I am at 1 life and my opponent is at 3 life. I tap my City of Brass to cast Lightning Bolt targeting my opponent. Do I die or does my opponent?

    A: Dies means “is put into a graveyard from the battlefield.” Since you are players and not creatures, neither player dies.

    Submit your questions to @goodgamery on Twitter using #judgescorner.