Good Gamery

Tag: Mobiusman

  • Borrowing 100,000 Bonfires

  • Vote Monster for a Fairer Innistrad

    If you’ve heard the speeches from the recent Church of Avacyn party conference, you’ve no doubt heard a great deal about how the Monster party wants to kill all humans and feast on their brains.

    But I am here today to offer a different viewpoint: that the Monster party is dedicated to establishing equality for all creature types across the plane of Innistrad.

    As is the case with so many great planes, here on Innistrad Humans – and, predominantly, white Humans – are the single most represented creature type, accounting for about 30% of the population. And up until now, this one race has dominated every aspect of our society – industry, commerce, and, most significantly, religion. The Church of Avacyn perpetuates damaging myths and stereotypes to condition humans to think of other races as unintelligent and dangerous. You’ve no doubt read the statistic that 100% of violent crimes committed by Monster party voters are directed towards humans; but I wouldn’t put too much stock in numbers like that. After all, it is technically impossible to commit violent crimes against most monsters, since we are legally dead.


    Vampires demand to
    be taken seriously.

    Ask yourself: have you ever actually seen a vampire feeding on a human? People tell their children that all vampires are consumed by addiction, unable to contribute to society because they cannot look past their next fix of blood. Worse, people believe that this addiction is somehow contagious, and shelter their families from socialising with their vampire neighbours.

    Now, I am not going to deny that the guests at the parties I have attended at castle Markov enjoy a drop of red now and again, but every vampire I have met has been fully in control of their urges – more than I can say for some humans I have met.

    Now consider, if you will, the treatment my own zombie kinsmen receive. I think it is fair to say that modern Innistraddian society was built on skaab labour, and yet zombie workers earn far less their human equivalents and have to deal with abusive discrimination from their employers. While it is medically accurate to describe zombies as ‘braindead’, it is entirely wrong to assume that our lack of a functioning nervous system impairs our intellect. Zombies can think – and zombies can feel. Many humans mistakenly assume that a zombie’s only motivation is a hunger for human brains, but many of us hunger instead for self-improvement and professional pride. Under our government, human firstborns will be taken as brain tax, but this is more indicative of the economic climate than any hidden zombie agenda.

    The “dead men don’t vote” act of 735 prohibited the spirit population of Innistrad from contributing to the democratic process. But as I survey this crowd today and see the faces of spirits, zombies and vampires gazing back at me, I say – aren’t we all dead? It is time for the government to recognise that a substantial portion of our society and culture is made up of the deceased, and that fact should be celebrated rather than suppressed. Many writers and artists only create their greatest works after they have died and have the benefit of a fresh perspective on life.


    Break through that
    glass ceiling!

    Perhaps worst of all is the plight of the proud werewolf. I remember a time when rural werewolf communities like Avabruck flourished, and residents were able to practise their traditional customs, like fighting, in peace. But under the Church of Avacyn, werewolves are forced to conceal their true natures for all but one night in every month. Instead of expressing their culture, they are made to live a lie if they want to get anywhere in the world. I want werewolves to be proud of their identity, and for their human colleagues not to shrink in fear from the fact that they are capable of hunting and killing them for sport.

    Now, it is true that our candidate, Griselbrand, has served several centuries of jail time. But he is a reformed demon, and I swear to you, from the bottoms of my five decorative hearts, that everyone in the Monster party is committed to realising our vision. Although monsters never sleep, we dream of establishing a new Innistrad where no-one need be staked, or exorcised, or preyed upon. Where humans and monsters can share both the night and the day. Where there is always food on every plate at night – regardless of, uh, the individual’s particular diet.

    Now, who will stand with me for a brighter day – and a blacker night?

  • I’m glad our next set is Dark Ascension

    by Fake Mark Rosewater

    Monday, September 5th, 2011

    Here at Wizards of the Coast, our work – like the work of Sir Isaac Newton before us – is all about experimentation. Whenever we introduce an exciting new idea, we are testing the waters to see what works and what doesn’t, and what we can rehash further down the line. The ‘free spells’ mechanic in Urza block was a huge success, so we revisited it in New Phyrexia. Increasing planeswalker complexity and utility with Jace, the Mind Sculptor didn’t cause any problems, so we decided to push forward with the five-ability Garruk Relentless, who requires a degree to operate correctly.

    With Innistrad we attempted the largest experiment of all, the Magic R&D equivalent of the Large Hadron Collider: double-faced cards. Although St. Richard Garfield originally intended to use card-backs as a means to differentiate between expansions, for the past eighteen years the reverse of a Magic card has been considered sacred ground. Imagine if we could unlock the full powers of both sides of a Magic card – that’s 100% more design space then we’re currently using. In this economic climate, that’s exactly the kind of efficiency-increasing solution we need to be coming up with.

    Double-faced cards, of course, have been hugely successful. Meeting with a glowing community reception since they were first spoiled, DFCs have consistently smashed any misgivings that might have been initially held with regards to issues like shuffling and drafting. The fact of the matter is, the idea of a CCG that uses a standardized card-back to conceal information is antiquated. I have previously stated that Innistrad is the beginning of a seven-year plan; by the end of these seven years I hope for every card in Magic to have a completely unique card-back.

    We understand that this will be a lot to take in, so rather than leap right in with flip-morph-transform cards that have a card from an entirely different CCG on the reverse, we will be introducing staggered changes to the card-back over the next few sets. Dark Ascension brings us the first and most obvious addition: Color-coding. Starting next February, all card-backs will be subtly recolored to indicate rarity.

    I could talk for pages and pages about how great an idea this is, but it might be more interesting for you if I answered a few of your questions instead! Here, then, is the official preliminary card-back FAQ!

    What about opaque sleeves?

    To properly accommodate the new card-backs, we will regrettably be forced to disallow the use of opaque sleeves from all Magic tournaments. If you really don’t want to go Au-natural, we are pleased to announce that our friends at UltraPro will be selling ‘booster packs’ containing eleven common-backed sleeves, three uncommon-backed sleeves, and one rare-backed sleeve. A small proportion of these packs will even contain a mythic rare sleeve!

    While I’m sure that UltraPro’s new product will be of the highest quality, I can’t afford to collect all these sleeves. Must I risk damage to my precious collection?

    We’ve got you covered – we will be giving players the option to swap their library with sixty checklist cards.

    Doesn’t this mean that all card rarities will be public information?

    It absolutely does – we feel that knowing when your opponent is about to draw their mythic bombs will add a strategic dimension to the game, not take anything away from it.

    Aren’t you worried about the possibility of cheating used marked card-backs?

    Nope!

    Tune in next time for the reveal of the next stage in the evolution of the cardback!

  • Jace proves too powerful for standard once again

    Earlier this year, the controversial decision was announced to ban Jace, the Mind Sculptor from standard tournaments. In his article explaining the banning, Director of Magic R&D Aaron Forsythe expressed his regret that Jace, who leaves the format in October, “nearly made it this time”. “Of course we were wary about reprinting a card with a history like Jace’s, but the higher power of modern standard environments allowed us to reintroduce cards like Lightning Bolt and Stone Giant last year. We thought we were ready for Jace. We were wrong.”

    Surveys taken at FNMs across the world revealed that although 68.5% of players thought the banning was justified, less than ten percent were even aware of the card’s lineage. Several local scrubs insisted that Planeswalkers were only introduced in the Lorwyn expansion until we showed them an original beta Jace.

    Jace, the Mind Sculptor was one of the cornerstones of early magic tournaments, providing a much-needed win condition for drawn-out control mirror matches. Under the original rules Jace’s ‘counts as a player’ clause meant that the card could not be countered and had to be provided with its own seat; when reprinted last year, these rules were done away with for logistical reasons.

    After a pro player tragically died of dehydration during a week-long match involving Stasis, Time Elemental, and chained Timetwisters, the DCI realised something had to be done, and banned Jace outright from all further tournaments. Jace remained banned from even vintage events due to health and safety risks until its printing last year in the Worldwake expansion.

    While Jace proved too powerful for the current standard environment, two other Zendikar block reprints of once-banned cards failed to achieve the level of noteriety they once commanded. Obsidian Fireheart originally required players to physically set their lands on fire, and its infamous ‘the land continues to burn’ wording was interpreted to mean that if a card went out prematurely, its controller could be issued a loss for failing to maintain the game state. Emrakul, the Aeons Torn, remembered fondly by collectors for its confusing printed mana cost and meaningless ‘legend-gold’ frame, was briefly outlawed from tournaments after Wizards of the Coast’s lawyers expressed concerns over the phrase ‘spells with colour’. Ironically, Emrakul was in another sense one of the most racially progressive creatures in Magic, as the first card to be printed with two subtypes.

  • A Message from the Future

    Hey, you there. Copper Myr. This is going to sound crazy, but… What year is this? Really? Okay. Thanks.

    By Kaldra, I’ve finally done it. All the lives that have been lost, all the good Mirrans enslaved… It won’t be for nothing. I have a chance to save them.

    Melira? Is that you? Listen, we don’t have time for questions. My name is Jor Kadeen. I come from a future where all of this… It’s compleat. Almost every man, woman, and child – infected or worse. It’s the Phyrexians, Melira. You’re the only one who can stop them, and that’s why they’re sending back in time a golem called Karnold to kill you. But I got to you first, and together we can –

    Hang on. Why are you looking at me like that?

    What do you mean you already know? Some… Some French guys already found out all this stuff? And you’re fine with the whole golem situation. Well, I mean, that’s great, obviously. No really, I’m happy for you. It seems like you have things under control! Shall I just… Go, then?

    No, you don’t have to feel bad. It’s just, I look kind of like a jerk, you know? We actually invented time travel for this. Do you know how complicated it is? It would literally take until the Phyrexians arrive for me to explain it to you. I had this big hero thing all built up in my head – you know I wrote down some one-liners for when we’re fighting Karnold? Yeah, I had a lot of free time while I was hurtling through a perpendicular dimension in the time capsule. I was going to say, “You Karn’t touch this!” Get it? No? Never mind.

    Karnold

    Look, I think it would be less awkward for both of us if I didn’t stick around. You don’t need my help anyway, right? I’m just gonna go find a nice spot near Lumengrid where I can unwind for a while. When the Phyrexians start invading, just give me a call, okay? Sorry to bother you like this. Uh… Yeah. Bye.

  • Exclusive Preview of Dual Land from Innistrad

    Over the years at GoodGamery we’ve had our fair share of exciting preview cards. As part of the Rise of the Eldrazi alliance we spoiled the Timmy-est card in a Timmy set, Spawnsire of Ulamog. For Magic 2011 we eschewed such whimsy for a card the average player on the street could really connect with: limited workhorse Quag Sickness. Those were heady days indeed, but two sets have gone by since then without so much as a whiff of exclusive news. Has GoodGamery been forgotten? That’s a rhetorical question. The answer is no.

    Today we are privileged not just to kick off the Innistrad spoiler season, but to give a tantalising glimpse into the fabric of the block itself. We have been entrusted with one of the fundamental components of the Innistrad universe: its dual lands. From Tundra in Alpha to Flooded Strand in Onslaught, from Hallowed Fountain in Ravnica to Seachrome Coast in Scars of Mirrodin, dual lands have always been a cornerstone of both fantasy worlds and tournament environments.

    But what exactly is a dual land? The Oxford English dictionary defines a dual land as “a land card that provides two colours of mana, or an indirect means of acquiring two colours of mana.” While technically accurate, this definition fails to account for the soul of the dual land, an intangible phenomenon that has touched the hearts of countless magic players. An exciting new dual is the perfect way to kick off exploration of an exciting new block, and we’re pleased to say our dual is quite a doozy. Are you ready to discover the horror lurking within? Don’t worry, we’ll be right there with you. Let’s go!



    (This land has, of course, been generated randomly for your convenience by the magical dual land generator. To share this specific card with other people, click here and use the share code at the bottom of the page.)

  • Magic Cardnames: A Helpful Guide

    It’s Friday night. After weeks of trying, you’ve finally convinced your powerful wizard friend to lend you a legacy deck and let you take a shot at the local monthly eternal event. You haven’t slept for days; you’ve spent every available moment reading up on the format and desperately trailing twitter feeds to look for the newest tech. You’ve turned away phonecalls from your family and your girlfriend. You’ve quit your job. There’s no way you can lose.

    You’re sitting down for the first round. Your opponent is in his teens and tells you cheerfully he’s never played the format before. Inside you’re fistpumping, but nothing shows on your cold, steely face as you draw your seven. Your opponent wins the die roll and leads with Vault of Whispers, Springleaf Drum, Ornithopter, and Frogmite. You put him on affinity, drop one of your friend’s FBB Tropical Islands, and cast Pithing Needle. “Naming Glacial Plating,” you announce coolly. Your opponent frowns at you, visibly unsettled, then untaps and, slowly, announces that he’s casting a Cranial Plating. The judge nods and, two minutes later, you’re two games down and out of the running.

    Don’t worry, reader, that wasn’t actually you. But it could be unless you know your cardnames! In this article we’ll go through some of the most common mixups and how to avoid them.

    Isochron Specter and Hypnotic Scepter

    One’s an iconic Alpha/Beta/Unlimited artifact, commonly called ‘scepter’. The other’s a powerful modern combo piece known simply as ‘specter’. See the problem? Luckily, it’s not difficult to figure out which is which if you think about it: scepters are tools for spellcasting, but specters are scary flying monsters, and thus are more likely to eat people than hypnotise them.

    Time Crypt and Mana Walk

    People misremember Mana Walk because its actual effect is almost impossibly bad. This unique promo was designed, along with Pale Moon, for a ‘mana colour matters’ set that was ultimately scrapped. Despite this, both cards were recycled: Mana Walk as a promo, and Pale Moon as a junk rare a few years later. Time Crypt, on the other hand, gets mixed up because people can’t believe quite how good it is. A prime example of original designer Richard Garfield not knowing how powerful certain effects would be, Time Crypt’s negligible drawback has allowed it to become a cornerstone of vintage.

    Welder and Goblin Tinker

    It’s easy to confuse these two artifact-based Urza’s Legacy Johnny cards. The best way to identify Goblin Tinker is from its amusingly non-functional printed wording. All three of the ‘then shuffle your library’ tutors (Goblin Tinker, Impulse, and Goblin Retrievers) were given errata in time for the Urza’s – Mirrodin extended season, where both of these cards saw fringe play.

    Ancestral Hymn and Recall to Tourach

    Frankly, I’m not sure how so many people manage to mix up a piece of the power nine with a quirky draw spell from Fallen Empires. Maybe they were thinking of some other game.

    Sylvan Winter

    The confusion around Sylvan Winter arises from a famous incident at PT – Los Angeles when pro player Shawn “Hammer” Regnier, on hearing the card’s effect, thought it was so powerful it must be a two-card combo. People have been referring to decks including a ‘Sylvan Such-and-Such’ or a ‘Winter Whatever’ ever since, although the original card has since fallen out of favour amongst deckbuilders.

  • Neurokmancer

    Venser’s journal, Mirrodin.

    7 cards – The grindclocks were striking sixty and the slick, dark tides washed in against the darkslick shores. I was new on the streets of Synod City, and had the distinct feeling I was not welcome. I had been summoned here for a reason, by some planeswalker in need, and I intended to help them however I could, as long as it involved exiling their permanents and returning them to the battlefield at the beginning of the next end step. But first I had to find them – and finding a distressed mage in Synod City is a little like finding a pithing needle in a smokestack: difficult, and involving many references to artifacts.

    6 cards – No matter the world, the one place to go to find information cheap is a local tavern. I stepped in from the quicksilver rain to the least expensive-looking joint I could see: a hole in the ground named the Myr Reservoir. Even before my eyes had adjusted to the low, smoky light I realised exactly what kind of establishment I had wandered into: the robot patrons were hunched over darksteel tankards of a noxious, bubbling slime I recognised as Phyrexian oil.


    “INTERROGATIVE – What’s your poison, stranger?” An enforcer of a myr addressed me from behind the bar, his dishrag disintegrating even as he swabbed it against an infected glass.


    “You hear of any planeswalkers passing through town recently?” I asked the droid straight, leaning forward over the counter conspiratorially and giving a slow wink. I slid an argentum coin towards him.


    “CRYPTIC STATEMENT – Look for the negative girl.” Popping the coin into his mouth for metals analysis, the myr turned away to poison another customer, and I slipped out into the rain.

    5 cards – The Knowledge Pool stands at the heart of Synod City, its ducts criss-crossing from spire to spire carrying knowledge from every corner of town. It’s kind of like a public library, except the information doesn’t come free and certainly isn’t public. Still, being a planeswalker does have its advantages, and after renting a terminal I was quickly able to equip an infiltration lens and dive deep into the system’s more sensitive networks. Sure enough, I spotted a user on the server under the name ‘Negative Girl’, masking her presence with a dummy signal containing the nonsense message ‘selling gg 9’. She, too, was deep in the data banks, evidently searching for something not intended for her eyes. I launched a psychogenic probe in her direction to find out exactly why she had spent the 3WU to call me, and to my surprise received this instantaneous answer:


    ‘He’s coming. Not safe here. Meet me elsewhere.’


    And with that, she was gone, utterly traceless. Although I didn’t understand her warning, I closed my channels and yanked the terminal as quickly as I could – but not before I felt a trail of red mana light up the pathways I had been perusing a moment before. Whoever we were up against – whoever ‘we’ were – they meant business.

    4 cards – I’m not the magical hacker I used to be. I had spent the remainder of the day worrying about tracers planted in my mana pool or mana shorts in my access protocols left by the mysterious red mage I had so narrowly avoided; instead, true to his colour philosophy, he somehow tracked me to my hotel and blew the doors off in the middle of the night. I hurriedly attempted to planeswalk away and gather my wits, but he stopped me with a guttural response:


    “Stop!” Rivulets of magma ran through my assailant’s surprisingly perfect abs. As he prepared to turn me to slag, a grin spread across his face. “Hammertime.”


    They say a cat has nine lives; luckily, I had won a spare from Ajani last week in a poker game. Moments before a mountain fell on me I felt a current of white mana wash over the hotel, quite suddenly reducing the mountain, the guest rooms, and the creepily nubile leonin staff to so much rubble. There she was, the fourth most attractive female planeswalker to see print: my old acquaintance Elspeth Tirel. Was she the reason I was here in the first place?

    3 cards – The hotheaded local planeswalker had got away, and he knew both of our faces. Elspeth and I figured we had about 24 hours before he or someone else came looking. There was a lot to do in that time, but the most important thing was to catch up over a glass of tanglesap. We took a table at a bar called the Gilded Lotus and I asked Elspeth what was going on. Her story was odd, to say the least: she had come to Mirrodin after ‘a wizard told her’ that the Phyrexians were hiding a powerful artifact from her homeworld here. She claimed to understand the risk that she was walking into a trapmaker’s snare, but was determined to find out the truth. After running afoul of security she had called me in for my knack for making things unblockable, but her signal had been weakened by the damping matrix over the area. It was clear that Synod City was hiding something, but I was worried about what exactly we would find.

    2 cards – I decided to stick around and help Elspeth, even though I hadn’t got to exile anyone’s permanents the whole time I’d been here. It was partly that I wanted to help her reclaim her past from the Phyrexians, and partly that I hoped we could increase both of our loyalties by proliferating, if you know what I mean. The artifact she was after was being held in a phyrexian vault guarded by a mean customer named Geth. Getting in would be no trouble, but I would need a plan if I didn’t want his artificial claws to ruin my award-winning face. Equally troubling was the fact that Elspeth didn’t even know what the spoils of the vault looked like – she had been told it was a mox of some sort, but whether diamond or just chrome there was no way of telling. Given some more time I could have gotten help from someone like Jace to ensure my face’s safety, but the appearance of our bodybuilding friend cost us that luxury. This may be the last entry.

    1 card – I snuck my way into the heart of the vault with no opposition. Even Geth himself was a disappointment, in spite of his fearsome appearance – the obviously delusional man had an obssession with vampires and undead slayers, and kept muttering something about the ‘five seasons of the angel’. I cast a keldon twilight to keep him occupied, because I knew he’d enjoy it.
    Inside the final chamber a single shaft of light fell on a small, glimmering object on a kind of altar – like a scene out of a Zendikari adventure story. As I stepped closer I could see that the altar was actually a complex network terminal, with the gem acting as a sort of arcane modem. There was no way to remove it without disturbing the server, but I figured just grabbing the thing and leaving as soon as possible was still the safest option. The gem itself did not look at all like I had expected: it was not made of any mineral I recognised, and was cut into a strange shape, its detailed textures making it look almost like a human brain. Still, it was not for me to judge the artistic customs of Elspeth’s homeworld, so I yanked the mox and was gone.

    0 cards – I don’t know if I’d say I regret the mox job, but it certainly didn’t work out the way I had intended it to. The stone had not been a relic at all, but a kind of breaker keeping in check an AI the Phyrexians had developed. The intelligence, which called itself Gleemax, was now free to expand itself throughout the city, and, perhaps, the multiverse. It was Gleemax itself that had tipped off Elspeth in the first place, of course, but it at least shielded us from the Phyrexians and rewarded for our services; I got a really shiny new helmet that is going to make Garruk super-jealous.
    I don’t know what Gleemax plans to do with its newfound freedom. It’s stayed under the radar thus far, letting the Phyrexians believe they’re still in control. It mentioned something to me about a particular plane it wanted to find, and a particular order of sorcerors I’d never heard of. The wizards of the sea, or something? Time will tell. It’s been a long sojourn even by my standards, but now… I’ve got some proliferating to do.

  • Life after Yawgmoth

    The events of the year 4205, commonly – if dramatically – referred to as ‘The Apocalypse’, left a lot of unresolved problems for Dominaria as a whole to deal with. Now, ten years later, the Good Gamery news team has set out to find the answer to one question nobody seems to want to ask: What happened to all the artifacts?

    “Just look at this thing,” sighs Saldrath, the celebrated artificer and optician known for his work restoring the Glasses of Urza. He sits back hopelessly in his chair and hands us a Phyrexian Lens. Sure enough, only a murky darkness is visible through the innocuous glass eyepiece. “It can’t have always been like this,” Sadrath grumbles. “Otherwise they wouldn’t have been able to see, right?”

    The optometrical tragedy is not an isolated incident. Historical relics and household conveniences alike bearing the mark of the Father of Machines have ceased to function ever since his destruction ten years ago. Junior research assistants walking through Phyrexian Portals have gone missing. Phyrexian Processors produce 0/0 specimens, which are put in their owner’s graveyards as a state-based action. Phyrexian Vaults refuse to lock their doors.

    Although these malfunctions may seem trivial compared to the large-scale ecological changes that have occured across Dominaria in the past decade, some experts are concerned about their lasting impact. Kabel, Tolarian archivist, tells us: “the fact is, we don’t know if society can function without Phyrexian power. Obviously we can do without the Phyrexian War Beasts and such, but what about Phyrexian Dishwashers? Phyrexian AC Converters? Phyrexian Change Sorters? No-one likes to admit it, but our economy is heavily reliant on Phyrexian manufacturing.”

    Certainly big talk, but for one Kjeldoran patrolman, the effects of the crisis have a more immediate form. Thangbrand Gyrdsson stands kneedeep in snow outside his newly-built home, futilely adjusting dials on his Phyrexian Snowcrusher. “Every winter, we go through this,” Thangbrand seethes, sticking his head into one of the many dormant chimneys on the juggernaut’s surface. “Give me the Invasion any day!”

  • The Angelic Page – Obituaries Column

    This article is a Summer of Emilevin’ contest entry. This 6 week contest gives out both weekly prizes and final prizes of booster packs! You are invited to participate and compete by making some awesome and/or hilarious content of your own! Click on the Summer of Emilevin’ banner above for more information.



    This promising young mountaineer fell to his death during an earthquake last week. A long way down was shorter than he thought.


    He was 24.

    Struck by lightning during a thunderstorm in the middle of a plains. It is thought her sigils attracted the bolt. Her pet snake was also killed.


    She was 31.

    Said the wrong thing at the wrong time.


    He was 19.

    Mauled by wolves after years of working with animals. His family are surprised it didn’t happen sooner.


    He was 43.

    Suddenly cut down by a doom blade just days after earning his pilot’s license. In his will he leaves one black mana to his fiancée to help the mourning process.


    He was 28.

    Reported missing 3 turns ago. ‘He just went out one day and never came back,’ says wife.


    He was 896454.

    In a moment of temporary insanity, dealt 1 damage to a tephraderm.


    He was 61.

    Died from injuries after her skirts suddenly caught fire. ‘The damage couldn’t be prevented,’ claim doctors.


    She was 55.

    Has not been seen since leaving home to become a farmer. His friends and family gain 2 life.


    He was 21 at the time of his disappearance.

    Melted down for parts. Any excess metal will be made into a memory jar and presented to her family.

    She was 29.

    Collapsed from shock after receiving a short, sharp fright from a face of fear. Had privately suffered from a history of heart palpitations.

    He was 27.

    Died during a training exercise on goblin war techniques. Faculty claims the accident was the result of ‘too many goblins’.

    She was 17.

    Fell into a mudhole after having an adverse reaction to an unyaro bee sting. ‘This was the last thing anyone expected to happen,’ says brother.

    She was 32.